Quote, Unquote

"The ones closest to you, are the ones who causes most hurt". We take for granted that we're the ones getting the hurt.

We never actually look at it from the other perspective. The other part to that saying would be, "One is more prone to be overly sensitive to the ones closest to them". I learnt this lesson the hard way. I always lived by the 1st quote, whereby I'm the victim and blame all my hurt on the other person. I was hit by this realization that it's not just ME ME ME it any relationship or circumstances.

There’s another saying that goes, “When you point your finger (the polite way, with your thumb) to blame others, FOUR fingers are pointing back at YOU”. I guess one have to evaluate their own actions and words, before judging others. Many people complain and blame others / circumstances for their failures BUT their biggest failure is not noticing their OWN faults.

Let me tell you a story...

There was once a girl. She fell in love and was happily leading her life with him. Initially, everywhere one or other went, the other would follow. But after awhile, he decided he wanted to have his own time. It was all fine, as she had her own friends too. Occasionally, he would join her when she met up with her friends.

All was well until one day, when he said he would join her with her friends and during the night, when she called him to confirm his attendance, he said he was tired and decided not to go. She got pissed off and showed it in her voice when she told him to just stay home. He didn't notice. They hung up and she weeped. All through her tears, she was asking herself questions like, 'How could he do this to ME?', 'Why does he make promises and break them in the end?', 'Why does he hurt ME?'. Little did she know, it was all about HER.

After 5 minutes of blaming and tears, she decided to see from his point of view. Thoughts ran through her mind. Thoughts like, 'He has a right to be tired', 'I was tired earlier but I had a nap and he just got back from work', 'Hell, even I sometimes don't feel like going out', 'He does try to make it on most occasions', 'He has always been there for me in times of need'. Then only her tears dried and she got ready for her outing. Without her man but with a clearer conscience.

Life does not revolve around oneself. Though there's another saying that goes, "Learn to love yourself before others can love you". That saying is true but if you love yourself too much, others will find it hard to find space in your life to love you as you've already taken up all the love-space.

I would say, "Love yourself, indulge sometimes, don’t torture yourself and allow others to be part of your life enough to love you too”.